I’d love to say that this is a motto to live by, because it is so funny, and I’d also love to say that I live by it. But realistically, there’s so much more to life than the petty things (and petting sweaty things :/).
As I age, I find that being petty is a waste of my energy and also a waste of other people’s time and energy as well. I used to think that I was somehow – covertly – teaching said person a lesson, or trying to subconsciously tell them to change something that they’re doing that annoys the hell out of me.
Unfortunately most humans aren’t mind readers.
Fortunately, I learned that fairly quickly after moving in with my current boyfriend after numerous attempts at being petty.
I think for a lot of people, it starts off as, “I’m not good with confrontation…I don’t want to be mean to them…I don’t know how else to ask them what I’ve already asked them 100 times!”
For me it was that and more. I grew up in a petty-ass household. My parents are petty with each other (sorry mom :/), so of course I learned from the best!
Here, I’ll give you a little example, months ago every time I would use the bathroom and we were out of toilet paper it just didn’t get replaced! What the hell! It bothered me to no end (still, honestly just thinking about it makes me a little angry). No, It’s not because I’m a controlling girlfriend, it’s a case of common decency – when you finish the roll, put a new one on.
So, eventually it got to the point where he would get the roll down from the cabinet, yet not put it on the toilet-paper-holder-thingy…how hard is that?
(Yes, I know I’m ranting, indulge me just a few more sentences, there is a point to this.)
After continuously asking nicely, and then moving straight into bitching and moaning about it (we go through a lot of toilet paper), I started to get petty. I started putting the empty toilet paper rolls on his desk, stacking them. Oh they gathered. Well that didn’t go as planned because he rarely even uses his desk.
See the game of being petty requires the player to be silent and patient for as long as necessary. You can’t be one of those little girls that can’t hold a secret or gets tired of waiting around for some one to discover something…It’s really all about a surprise attack, or so I was taught.
Once I realized the desk idea wasn’t working, I decided to give it another try and put them into his shoes so that every time he put them on he’d be like, “Whhaa? Why the fuck is there a toilet paper roll in my shoe?” The guy has a lot of shoes. I’m talking more than most girls. He has a pair for every outfit, and that gave me a lot of rolls to hide. I started with the shoes in the back of the closet, the ones he wore the least and started filling them randomly. I’ll admit, it got out of hand.
Once he started finding empty rolls in his shoes and I guess realized that they didn’t just get in there themselves, he asked me about it and finally the tissue issue was resolved.
Except now he puts it on the wrong way. 😦  No, but honestly I’m just glad he puts in on the dohicky at all…
Planning that whole toilet paper roll fiasco thing required a lot of time and energy, and it was all spent in the wrong direction. I knew that then and I know it now. Petty shit can get a person in a lot of trouble, it’s just not worth it. Sometimes people take things too seriously and after a while it becomes an annoying competition (nudge, nudge – parents). There’s no reason to let things get that far, just be real. Open up and talk to the other person about what’s on your mind. It may not be easy, it may cause a little or a lot of pain, but maybe in the long run you’ll both be better for it.
Stop sweating the petty things, and please for God sake DO NOT pet the sweaty things.
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